Yo quiero

                As I traveled to the Dominican again I was excited about what God had in store. I know that whenever we break out of our comfort zones, God uses the opportunity to teach us if we are willing to learn. 

                I spent most of my time at the Social Work Site in El Callejon. Obstacle number one: the language barrier. Thankfully the Lord provided patient servants of service who willingly taught me “un chin” (a little bit) of the language each day. Needless to say, everyone received some comic relief as I stumbled over pronunciation.  One of my frequent mistakes was saying “the floor” instead of “heaven”. Just imagine hearing someone say “Our God in the floor is faithful.”  Among all the sayings I learned, the first and most useful was the phrase yo quiero, which translates into I want.

                After having time to reflect on the trip, my summer, my year, and the future, I realized that my mindset and the cry of my heart seems to be yo quiero.  I want this and that. I want a bright future, security, a new phone, cute clothes, and perfect relationships. I want things to work out perfectly in my timing, just the way I planned it to.  I want. 

                My consumption mindset leaves little room for God’s giving spirit to fill me. When I am so focused on the things around me instead of the things above me, I am living for the wrong purpose and I am running the race towards a prize that will disintegrate.

                You can seem to have your life together; go on mission’s trips, attend church every week, pray before meals, and read a chapter of your bible each night…but if our hearts have not been surrendered to Christ then our weaknesses will easily be attacked by Satan. If we don’t accept God’s incredible and undeserved gift of Jesus, then we are wandering lost.

                I get frustrated with myself when I think about how much time I spend doing things that please myself instead of furthering the Kingdom.  We are called to store up our treasures in Heaven. Instead of doing an occasional good deed, I pray that my lifestyle is one that belittles the importance of selfish and sinful desires. I pray that I truly run the race marked out for us with my all. God deserves my adoration, repentance, thoughts, and heart. Let’s be honest, He deserves everything.

                Day after day, the ways of this world present themselves in such an appealing light. I don’t want to conform. Therefore I am planning on surrendering myself daily to Him. Instead of saying yo quiero, I will be asking the Lord what He wants.

                I want to be where you are. I want to follow you, Lord... Your plans are far better than mine.